A Guardians' Feelings
by neko-valentine
Summary: Yue has feelings for Sakura. Will he tell her? R+R PLEASEEEEE???? COMPLETE!!!
1. Default Chapter

disclaimer: I don NOT own Cardcaptor Sakura or anything to do with it except for my Yue plushie. ::hugs it:: I LOVE my Yue plushie!!!!!  
  
A Guardians' Feelings by neko_valentine  
  
Gods, she's beautiful, he thought as he gazed at her as she sat on her bed. Watching her had become a habbit of his lately, even if he was sitting on the floor. He just couldn't help it. Ever since she'd beaten him in the Final Judgement, he had grown extremly attached to her. He couldn't explain it either. Maybe it was because he...  
  
No, he told himself. You couldn't... You're her guardian for heaven's sake! You couldn't.. You can't-  
  
"Hey Yue?"  
  
Sakura interuted his thoughts.  
  
"Y-yes..?" he asked, trying to hide the affection in his voice.  
  
"Who do you think wants me to change the Clow Cards into Star Cards so quick?" she asked him.  
  
"I am not sure," Yue replied.  
  
Sakura turned to Kero. "Do you have any idea?"  
  
"Nope," Kero said, shaking his head. Then he went downstairs to get a snack.  
  
"Hmmm.... who could it be??" Sakura thought for a moment. "Hey, maybe Li can help us figure it out!"  
  
Yue felt a pang of jealously. He knew of her growing affection for the Chinese boy and frankly, he detested it. Loathed it. Hated it. He wanted her affection for himself, and for her to forget about him. He wasn't right for her at all. Snarling, Yue growled, "Probably not."  
  
Sakura looked at him. "Yue! What's gotten into you?"  
  
"...nothing..." Yue said, ashamed.  
  
She looked at him worriedly. "Are you sure?"  
  
"I am just a bit tired."  
  
"Well, maybe you should rest up here for a while. Me and Kero can stay downstairs because Dad and Tori aren't home."  
  
Yue nodded.  
  
Sakura walked over to him, bent down and kissed Yue's cheek. "Goodnight," she said fondly. Then followed Kero downstairs.  
  
Yue reached his hand up and touched his cheek softly. And he smiled, knowing finally that he was loved; even if it was only a friendship type of love.  
  
Hmm, Yue thought. Maybe I can change that. 


	2. ch2Afraid

disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura or anything to do with it. This fic has been disclaimed... Now you can read it!!!  
  
A/N-: this was only supposed to be a one part thing but three (a whole three!) ppl liked my fic and two of em asked me to continue. I got inspired!! (not sure if that's spelled right..) Anyway, I'll shut up now so you can read the fic.  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch 2 - Afraid... by neko_valentine  
  
Snowy white fields surrounded him as he stood there, clawed* feet freezing in it. Yue looked all around wondering where he was and what he was doing there.  
  
"Yue..."  
  
He sharply looked around for the source of the soft, quiet voice, silver eyes darting from right to left. Not seeing anything but white snow, he closed his eyes and went back to his quiet wonderings.  
  
"Yue.." the voice said louder.  
  
Again Yue looked sharply around. Seeing no one was starting to get to him; especially when the voice seemed to be getting louder and closer. So he stood there, expecting an attack or something but he instead felt a light tap on his back. He turned and looked around. Then looked down.  
  
Standing there in her pj's shivering was Sakura. She looked up at him with her big beautiful green eyes and he smiled. At least he wasn't alone in this wintry abyss.  
  
She suddenly sneezed, catching his attention. Yue felt worry build within him. "Sakura, what are you doing out here in the cold?" he asked her.  
  
"I don't know..." she answered and then sneezed again. "One minute I was at home in bed, and the next I'm out here with you."  
  
Yue carefully lifted her out of the snow and into his arms. "You must be freezing.."  
  
Sakura snuggled into his warm chest and sighed.  
  
"I'll be fine now."  
  
Yue stared down at her for a moment, aghast. Then he felt a warm fuzzy sensation all over his body and smiled. This must be what it feels like to- no.. I couldn't...love Sakura... could I? He closed his eyes. No! I cannot.. I am ages older than she is. And she would surely reject me..  
  
Yue's eyes snapped open when he felt the beautiful child in his arms grow lighter and lighter. Slowly but surely she was fading away as she slept.  
  
"Sakura!" Yue exclaimed.  
  
She opened her eyes half way and looked up at him. She smiled and closed her eyes again.  
  
Then, she was gone completely.  
  
"Sakura..." Yue said, heartbroken. Slowly he fell to his knees.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Yue awoke with a start in Sakura's room. He looked over to the bed immediately and found Sakura sound asleep.  
  
Yue sighed and relaxed knowing it was all just a dream and that she never really disappeared. But... the dream must mean something... Could it mean that I am a danger to Sakura? That I would hurt her if she ever found out my real feelings..? Maybe.. I should keep my distance from her...  
  
Yue thought on this. Maybe that's what the dream WAS telling him; that he should stay away from Sakura lest he hurt her. Yue thought on this for the rest of the night.  
  
~fin of ch 2~  
  
*= I just think that Yue's feet are clawed, so if they're not, don't flame me!  
  
What didja think!?! I need to know!!! So pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssseeeeeeeee R+R!!!!!!!!!!!!! (I sound like a hyper teenager! That's cuz I am!!!!!!!!!!!!!) 


	3. ch3Feeling Rejected

disclaimer: I HATE diclaimers!! People already know you don't own 'em! Anywhoo, I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura or anything to do with it, unfortunately. ::sigh::  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch 3 - Feeling Rejected  
  
By neko_valentine  
  
Sakura awoke with a start the next morning. She'd had the weirdest dream. She had dreamt that she was in a snowy field with Yue and that she had then disappeared from his arms.  
  
'Oh well,' she thought. 'It was only a dream..'  
  
Sakura sat up, stretched, and yawned. She looked around and spotted Kero asleep on the floor and Yue was nowhere to be seen.  
  
'Must be downstairs.'  
  
Being careful not to wake Kero, Sakura got out of bed and proceeded downstairs. She didn't even bother to get dressed like she usually did because Tori and her father were gone camping and herself, Kero and Yue were the only ones home.  
  
Sakura found Yue in the living room. He was standing upright, as usual, and he was gazing out of the window, sad expression on his face.  
  
"Yue..?" Sakura called timidly. She was a little afraid to disturb him.  
  
Yue immediately snapped out of his revere and looked over at her with cold eyes. She winced a little under the cold gaze.  
  
"M-morning, Yue," Sakura stuttered.  
  
"..good morning, Mistress," Yue replied coldly.  
  
She winced again. "W-would you l-like some breakfast?"  
  
Yue remained silent.  
  
"I'll take that as a yes then. I'll be in the kitchen." And she left for the kitchen.  
  
Yue let out a long sigh. He felt that he had hurt her deeply. He really didn't want to hurt her like that, but he had to. It was for the best.  
  
'Is it?' Yue questioned himself angrily. 'I just hurt the one I love more than life itself.. and I'm saying it's for the best?'  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
In the kitchen, Sakura started making toast and eggs for breakfast. Her thoughts, however, were not on what she was cooking.  
  
'How could he say those things to me..?' she thought sadly. 'I thought he was starting to open up to me a little. I guess he hates me after all...'  
  
Slowly, one single, lone tear made it's way down her cheek and fell onto the frying pan she was cooking the eggs in. That gave way to another one falling, and then another and another until she was silently crying her heart out.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
From his hiding place on the stairs, Kero could just make out the crystal- like tear that slid down his mistresses' face. Another and another followed that one until she was crying full-fledgedly. He had no idea what she was crying for, but it probably had something to do with her talk with Yue.  
  
Kero gritted his teeth. If he hurt her. he'd make sure Yue felt what was coming to him even if he was stuck in his stuffed animal form. So slowly he made his way down the rest of the stairs and into the living room.  
  
~fin of ch 3~  
  
A/N: Ohhhhhhh, I can feel the fight that's gonna happen! Anyway, review pleeeaaaassssseeeeeeee?????? 


	4. ch4 How To Start A Fist Fight

disclaimer: No I don't own it, okay!?  
  
A Guardians' Feeling - Ch.4 - How to Start a Fist Fight by neko_valentine  
  
Kero started into the living room and saw Yue looking out the window sorrowfully, lost in thought. Meaningfully, he stepped towards the tall silver eyed guardian, trying not to make a sound with his massive paws. It was in vain.  
  
"What do you want, Kero Bearous?" Yue asked coldly, not even looking away from the window.  
  
Kero growled. "What did you say to Sakura?!" he demanded angrily.  
  
"How would you know if I said anything to her?" Yue replied as he turned around and glared at the winged lion.  
  
"Because she's in the kitchen crying her heart out about something and I have a feeling you have something to do with it!" Kero growled.  
  
ue stared at him, agast. 'I...made her cry...?' he thought to himself. 'Am I really that cold....that I would make my beautiful litle one cry..?'  
  
"Well, aren't you going to say anything?!" Kero snapped.  
  
Yue lowered his head, ashamed. How could he have said such things to her?  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Back in the kitchen, Sakura had forgotten the eggs and had grabbed the phone. She needed to talk to somebody about this, so she dialed the first number that popped into her head.  
  
It rang twice before someone picked up the phone.  
  
"Hello?" said a voice.  
  
"Li?" Sakura asked, confused.  
  
"Sakura?" Li asked, sounding equally confused.  
  
"Li..." Sakura said, sniffling. "Can I talk to you about something...?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
So Sakura told Li everything that Yue had said and about the dream she'd had. Li was vexed about what Yue had said.  
  
"He really said that to you?!" he asked, angery at the human-like guardian. "I'm coming over right now! Be right there!" Li paused for a second. "Don't worry, Sakura," he said comfortingly. "Yue's cold and stoic anyway."  
  
With that he hung up and so did Sakura. She then sat on the floor, back against a cupboard, and started crying again.  
  
~fin of ch.4~  
  
A/N: Sorry for the weird, crappy title, but it was all I could think of. ^__~* Anyway, review!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE???????????? ::gets down on her knees:: I'm begging you!!! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaassssseeeee?????????????? If you do, I'll give you a millon $$!! Accually, I probably won't, but- ack!! ::avoids large objects being thrown at her:: Review anyway!! ::runs away from angery mob who wants their millon $$:: 


	5. ch5 Confrontation

disclaimer: No, I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura, damn it!!!  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - Ch. 5 - Confrontation by neko_valentine  
  
By the time Li got to Sakura's house, it had stated to rain. Not even bothering to knock, he opened the door and atarted looking for Sakura.  
  
He glanced into the living room and spotted Yue. Li glared at him and Yue glared back before Li went into the kitchen. There he found Sakura, curled up against a cupboard crying. He immedeately rushed to her side and she collapsed into his arms.  
  
"Li..." she whimpered. "Thanks for coming over...."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Yue still had his head down even after Kero had left the room. He couldn't help but think how... right the usually jokitive guardian was. He had hurt Sakura, and all because he was too stubbern to admitt that he loved her.  
  
Yue's thoughts were disturbed when he felt the all-to-familiar presence of the Showron* boy. Yue snarled and glared as he passed by the living room, glaring, and headed to the kitchen. He felt that old pang of jealousy he got whenever Li used to come with them.  
  
So, he headed fot the kitchen.  
  
Yue stopped outside the archway when he heard Sakura whimper something and Li whisper something back to her. He didn't hear very well but it was something along the lines of, "Thanks for coming over", and then a "No problem".  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Li could sence Yue listening to them. The white haired supposed "guardian" was standing outside the archway.  
  
"Sakura..." he whispered to the weeping angel in his arms. "I need to take care of something. I'll be right back."  
  
Sakura sniffled. "Okay... Come right back...!"  
  
Li nodded before letting go of her, standing, and walking out of the kitchen. He met a very startled Yue.  
  
"Yue," Li said. "Can we talk in the living room for a minute?"  
  
Yue reluctantly nodded and followed Li into the said room.  
  
Upon walking into the living room, he recived a swift kick to the face as a result of Li jumping off the wall to prepel himself. Yue stumbled but quickly regained his balence. He put a hand up to his cheek to find it bleeding. He snarled and looked over at where Li was standing, in a fighting position, ready to move if Yue chose to attack him.  
  
But Yue didn't.  
  
"Why did you kick me?" Yue snarled.  
  
Li narrowed his eyes. "You know why, you arragent bastard."**  
  
"And what makes you think I know?"  
  
"I know what you said to Sakura!!" Li spat. "And if you do it again, you'll be seeing more of my foot in your face. Just cuz you feel for her doesn't mean you can say such things to her!"  
  
Yue snorted. "Do not threaten me. I care nothing for Sakura-" Lie "-and I never will." Another lie. Why did he have to lie about what he felt?  
  
Li walked straight up to Yue and (having to look up) glared at him. "How about this, then? You stay the hell away from Sakura at all times. Got it?"  
  
"Not a problem."  
  
~fin of ch. 5~  
  
*=I have NO clue how to spell Li's last name. Someone review and tell me, please??? **=such laguage for a twelve year old! (yes, Li and Sakura are twelve in this fic) 


	6. ch6 A Pleasant Surprise

disclaimer: I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura. If I did, I wouldn't be writing this wonderful fic, would I?  
  
A/N: Gomen! It took so long to post this chapter! I haven't been allowed on the computer very much cuz of those god-awful midterms. DAMN THEM!!!!!  
  
A/N2: I'm using the dubbed version of everybody's names in this fic. Just wanted to let you know!  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch.6 - A Pleasant Surprise by neko_valentine  
  
Six years had passed since Yue's encounter with Li. Yue had kept his word to Li and hadn't spoken to Sakura since then, unless it was absolutely necessary. Still residing within Julian, it wasn't that hard. But, still being her guardian, he watched over her in secret.  
  
Sakura had grown up alot. Her once stick-like figure had been replaced with a more shapely one and her former short, light brown hair was now down to the middle of her back and streaked with blonde highlights. She had grown taller as well. She was now 5'4", a little short for eighteen, but no one cared about that.  
  
She had also started dating the Showron boy. This infuriated Yue to no extent. He was just so... wrong for her. He, himself, would be so much better for her! The way he looked at her disturbed Yue as well. He always glanced at her from he corner of his eye with an almost hateful stare, like he was afraid she'd leave him or something if her left her alone with another man.  
  
That is why he had started beating her.  
  
It was true. Although you'd never guess it from the outside, Li beat Sakura if she so much as looked at another guy. He was all happy smiles and hugs when with company, but it was afterwards, when he and Sakura were alone that he'd get violent. Yue had to resist the erge to swoop down there and just kick the crap out of him. But no. If Sakura wanted to put up with this then he had no right to interfere.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
One night, about the middle of March, in pouring rain, Julian received a knock at the door of his grandparent's house. His grandmother and grandfather were off on another vacation so he had the place to himself.  
  
"Just a minute," Julian called. The knocking became more and more urgent with each second.  
  
Julian reached the door and opened it. He gasped.  
  
Standing there, looking completely battered and soaked to the bone, was Sakura.  
  
~fin of ch.6~  
  
A/N: Could that chapter make any littler sense?! (littler's a word?) Well, this is going one of the last chapters. I think I might post 2 more or something. Anyway, review please!!! ^_^ 


	7. ch7 Feelings

disclaimer: no, I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura or anything to do with it. *sniff* Wish I did though...  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch.7 - Feelings Revealed by neko_valentine  
  
"Sakura?!" Julian asked, completely surprised.  
  
Sakura smiled weakly. "Hey.. Julian..." She started to collapse but he caught her as she fell.  
  
"What happened to you!?" he asked as he carried her inside and shut the door with his hip.  
  
"Li..." She gasped for air. "Li got violent again... He... he started beating me... cuz I said I missed you and Yue... and that I haven't seen you in a while..."  
  
Julian shook his head in despair. 'Oh Li...' he thought. 'What have you done?'  
  
Laying her gently down on the bed, he went to get her some green tea. He put the kettle on and went back to the bed. He took Sakura's hand in his own and looked very sternly at her. "Sakura.." he said. "If he beats you like that, why don't you leave him?"  
  
Sakura opened her eyes a little. "Because... he needs a reason to live... Everyone does..."  
  
Julian looked at her with wide eyes. 'Everyone does...' That was his little cherry blossom, couldn't help but help people. He smiled at her and she smiled back, abet weakly.  
  
'Julian..'  
  
Julian snapped out of his thoughts at Yue's voice inside his head. 'Let me speak with her.'  
  
He stood up and stepped away from the bed. Sakura watched him curiously. Slowly, wings started to erupt from his back and surround his lean body. All of a sudden the wings separated and Yue floated to the floor. His cold eyes softened at the sight of Sakura. Yue walked over to the bed and sat down. Sakura sat up.  
  
"Sakura.." Yue said timidly. "I have something to tell you..."  
  
"What is it, Yue..?" Sakura asked softly. She put her small hand on his larger one and smiled.  
  
Yue smiled back at her. "What I'm going to tell you, you may find it strange or even be disgusted by it."  
  
"What is it, Yue?"  
  
Yue looked into her eyes and all he saw was the love that she held for him.  
  
Sakura looked into his eyes and saw an emotion that she couldn't quite place. She'd seen it before, not from Li, but from someone else. Someone long ago.  
  
"Sakura," Yue said taking her out of her revere. "I just wanted to say that.... I..." He gulped. What if she rejected him? What if she laughed in his face?  
  
"You what?" Sakura just wanted him to spit it out.  
  
"I just wanted to tell you that I... love you..."  
  
Sakura gasped. She had barely heard the last part but still understood it. Yue looked at her, fearful of her reaction.  
  
Slowly, Sakura smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. Yue was more than a little startled. He had expected her to look at him in disgust and turn him away, but she accepted it. She accepted his love for her. He brought his arms up and wrapped them around her back, returning the hug. Sakura mumbled something into his shoulder and for a moment he wondered if he'd heard her right. His question was answered when she lightly kissed him on the lips. He didn't let her pull away and kissed her back with all the passion that he could. And she didn't protest.  
  
~fin of ch.7~  
  
A/N: I'm sorry to all Sakura/Li fans, but I just love this couple SOOOOO MUCH!!! They're just so cute together! Anyway, if any Sakura/ Li fans flame me I will laugh at you and then laugh some more. And if anyone found this more than a little romantic, it's just because I was feeling very romantic when I wrote this. ^_~ As always, review please! 


	8. ch8 threat

disclaimer: No I do not own Cardcaptor Sakura or any of it's characters or places or whatever.  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch.8 - A Threat by neko_valentine  
  
Sakura and Yue spent the whole night in each others arms. Both of them slept peacefully. Until about 5 or so the next morning...  
  
Yue awoke abruptly by the feeling of Sakura being dragged from his arms. That and the high-pitched scream.  
  
Sakura had been woken by being dragged out of the bed and onto the floor by her hair. She screamed and that woke Yue. Sakura looked up and what she saw chilled her to the bone.  
  
Li was holding on to her hair, his unnaturally violent nature showing clearly in his brown eyes. She looked up at him with a look of fear before she was hauled up off the floor by the hair.  
  
Yue was there in a flash. He grabbed Li by the scruff and the surprise caused him to release Sakura's hair. Yue then threw Li into a wall.  
  
"What the HELL do you think you're doing!?" Li demanded angrily. "What the HELL are you thinking, sleeping with MY Sakura!!"  
  
"We did NOT sleep together," Yue said, calm as he could be at the moment. "We simply slept. And she is not yours."  
  
Li glared at him and then at Sakura. Sakura shrunk back in fear behind Yue.  
  
"YOU!!" Li exclaimed angrily, pointing his finger at Sakura. "What did I tell you!?! Not to leave the apartment!! I'll deal with you when we get home! Now, come on. We're leaving!!"  
  
Sakura whimpered and looked up at Yue helplessly. He smiled reassuringly at her and then looked back at Li. "I do not think that she wishes to go with you."  
  
"Oh yeah?! How would you know!?!?! It's not like you were there for her at all!!!"  
  
Yue narrowed his eyes. "That would be your fault. I do recall a time when you kicked me in the face and told me not to go near her."  
  
Sakura gasped. 'That's why...' she thought. '...he's been very distant with me for years...'  
  
"Grrr..." Li growled and clenched his fists. He and Sakura were going to get married and she would be the perfect wife if he had to beat her to death to do it. "Well...." Li said, trying very hard to defend his point. "Sakura, remember when we were little, he was so mean to you, you didn't even want to look at him!"  
  
She looked down. She'd forgotten about that...  
  
"Sakura..." Yue said softly. "I never got to apologies for that... I was so mixed up with my feelings for you, that I didn't know what I had done until after I had done it. I felt do ashamed that I didn't want to look you in the eye since."  
  
Sakura smiled and hugged him around the waist. "It's okay... I never got to tell you my feelings either..."  
  
"WAH!?!?!???!" Li exclaimed. "Oh, so now you're going to go with him, are you??! You and I were supposed to be married and have lots of children!!!" He suddenly looked very sad and depressed. "...Sakura.... please. You can't leave me.... I don't know what I'd do without you..."  
  
Sakura shook her head, trying very hard not to let the tears flow. "I'm... sorry, Li... I can't forgive you for what you've done to me! Please! Just try to go on with your life..."  
  
Li looked heartbroken and then angry. "Fine!!" he shouted. "Just don't come crying to me if you find him dead!!" He turned to leave and stopped. "Or worse... hurting you again..."  
  
Then he left.  
  
~fin of ch.8~  
  
A/N: How screwed up was that?? I have NO clue as to where all that stuff came from! ^____^ Anywho, please, review and tell me what you think!! 


	9. ch9 He's Gone

disclaimer: Yes!! I own Cardcaptor Sakura!!! :P No, not really though. Wish I did.  
  
A/N: there will be a few implications of... stuff in this chapter that might not be appropriate for younger readers. You know, suicide, sex, etc, etc...  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - ch.9 - He's Gone... by neko_valentine  
  
Sakura was still nervous even after Li had left. Yue tried to calm her down but it was to no avail.  
  
"He said 'Don't come crying to me if you find him dead'!!! How can I not be worried about you?!"  
  
Yue hugged her lovingly. "Do not worry, Sakura," he said. "I am very capable of taking care of myself."  
  
Sakura sighed. She wouldn't be able to stop worrying about him for a long time. Li had practically threatened to KILL Yue and he wanted her to calm down? Not with her past experiences with Li and his angry side...  
  
"Sakura..."  
  
She snapped out of her trance and looked at the white haired guardian that sat beside her on the bed. She smiled at him. 'He loves me,' she thought. 'He really loves me and I love him back. Li was never like this... so compassionate... so loving...'  
  
"Sakura," Yue said. "I hate to see you so worked up over that little thing HE said. Please, don't worry about me. He won't try anything."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"I can't BELIEVE her!!!"  
  
The angry 18 year old stormed down the street, walking at a fast pace. He eventually calmed down and slowed his pace enormously. He now walked, dragging his feet along the ground, head hung.  
  
"How could she leave me..?" Li asked himself sadly. "I only hurt her cuz I was afraid... afraid she would leave me. But not even that worked!!" He stopped and kicked at a can lying on the road.  
  
A sudden thought struck him. Sakura didn't need him anymore. She had her big strong YUE to love and protect her! And she loved Yue back...  
  
It was right then and there that he decided to end all the hurt.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was the next morning that Sakura was woken up by a furious pounding on the door of Julian's house. The knocking didn't seem to disturb Yue's peaceful slumber.  
  
"Oh well..." Sakura thought out loud. She got up out of bed and went to the door. She looked out through the little window and saw that it was only Madison. She hurriedly opened the door.  
  
"Hey, Madison!" Sakura said cheerfully. Her smile dropped when she saw that Madison looked grave. Very grave indeed. "What's wrong?"  
  
Madison suddenly hugged Sakura tightly around the waist and burst into tear. "It-it's Li..." she said between sobs. "He... he's..."  
  
"He's what, Madison?"  
  
She sniffled. "He... killed himself..."  
  
Sakura looked down at her with wide eyes. "He... what?!"  
  
"It was last night... He stabbed himself... though the stomach. I went to his apartment this morning because he looked really sad yesterday... and I found him lying in his kitchen floor in a puddle of blood!" Madison started crying hysterically again.  
  
Sakura couldn't believe it. She stood in the doorway, eyes wide, stroking Madison's black hair. Slowly, she started to cry. She loved him, she really did. But it was just that she loved Yue more and when Li hurt her, she lost sight of all the love... But it didn't matter anymore because he was gone! He'd beaten her, abused her, and now had to put her through the grief of him killing himself.  
  
'When is all the pain going to end?' she asked herself.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Yue awoke from his peaceful slumber, stretched and yawned. He noticed that Sakura wasn't sleeping beside him like she was the night before. As he pondered on that, he heard the faint sound of someone crying. He got up off the bed and looked for the source.  
  
He found Sakura holding a crying Madison in her arms in the doorway to his house. Tears were silently flowing down Sakura's cheeks as well but if you weren't looking directly at her, you wouldn't be able to tell that she was crying.  
  
"Sakura?" Yue called softly. She immediately snapped her head to the side to look at him. He saw that her emerald green eyes were all red and puffy.  
  
"Sakura, what is the matter?" he asked.  
  
She sniffed. "It-it's Li..." she stuttered. "He killed himself last night."  
  
Yue's eyes went wide. He couldn't believe it. 'Li.. he couldn't have... He wouldn't of! He really isn't that cruel as to put Sakura through that... is he?'  
  
"Oh, Sakura," Yue said stepping towards her. "I am so sorry. I know that you loved him very much, even though he..."  
  
Suddenly, Madison looked up from Sakura's shoulder. "Oh, Yue!" she said, mock cheerfulness, eyes puffy. "I didn't know you were here. I-I'll leave now..."  
  
And she did.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
After Madison left, Yue came up behind Sakura and wrapped his arms around her waist. He nuzzled her shoulder with his face.  
  
"Yue.." she said. "Why won't the pain end..? Why is all of this happening to me?"  
  
Yue sighed. "I do not know, Sakura," he said softly. "But I do know this; all the pain you are going through now will help you somehow later in life*."  
  
She let her head fall backwards onto Yue's shoulder and closed her eyes. "How could such pain help me later in life..?"  
  
Yue turned Sakura around in his arms and tilted her head up so he could look in her eyes. "By making it seem so small in comparison." He slowly started to lower his head.  
  
Sakura smiled, a small one, but a smile none the less. Then she tilted her head up to meet his lips.  
  
The kiss was soft at first then turned deeper as the two wanted more and more to forget all that was going on around them. Sakura put her hands up onto Yue's shoulders and desperately tried to pull him closer than he already was.  
  
As if gravity was moving them, the two started moving. They blindly stumbled about until they found their way to the bed. Gently, Yue laid Sakura down on it and she pulled him down on top of her. Slowly, they undressed each other and continued making their sweet love.  
  
~fin of ch.9~  
  
*= I was told this by my school consular when I was in therapy because of depression when my grandfather died. The consular was nuts... PAIN CAN'T HELP YOU!!! YOU MUST LEARN TO FACE IT LIKE A MAN!!!! Or woman, whatever.  
  
A/N: what did you think?? I didn't want to continue cuz I can't write lemons. I tried with this but it sounded like something from a bad porno film... Anyway, R+R plz. 


	10. Epilogue

disclaimer: I do NOT own Cardcaptor Sakura or anything to do with it. I own the plot to this crapola story...  
  
A/N: this is the end! Last ch. in the story!!!! Sorry if you wanted more but I really have to sum this up cuz I have to start working on the sequel. Oh!! Did I say that out loud? Crap, I ruined the surprise!! I was gonna tell ya at the end of it but... It's out now so I can't do a thing about it!!!  
  
A Guardians' Feelings - Epilogue - Years Later by neko_valentine  
  
The tall silver haired man stood just outside the graveyard gates. Yue had Sakura separate him and Julian so Julian wouldn't be caught in the middle of his and the Clow Masters' relationship.  
  
He dressed in more normal attire and had his hair cut short. Not short short; it was still kind of long but way shorter than it was.  
  
Now, he patiently waited for Sakura to pay her respects to the person she once loved.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Inside the graveyard, Sakura stood in front of the marble tombstone that marked the place of a person she once loved, bouquet of flowers in hand.  
  
'No,' she thought. 'I still love him... just not in the way he would like. I love him like a brother, and that is all the love I can manage for him anymore...'  
  
A tug on her hand turned her attention downward. Sakura smiled fondly at her daughter, Kathryn. The child had a mop of short silver hair atop her head and emerald green eyes. She was no more than five years old, but she had her fathers' stature; serious and quiet. But she also had a bit of her mother in there; her playfulness and athletic abilities, her optimism and outgoing personality.  
  
"Momma," Kathryn asked. "Can we go home now? I'm hungry."  
  
"Alright," Sakura said. Slowly, she put the flowers at the base of the tombstone and smiled. He was happy now. So was she.  
  
Sakura took Kathryn's hand and walked out of the graveyard.  
  
~*~*~*~  
  
Yue was suddenly startled by a weight on his leg. He looked down and saw his daughter attached to it.  
  
"Kathryn," he asked. "Where's your mother?"  
  
The child looked up at him and pointed to the left. He looked over to see his wife staring fondly at him, smiling. She never thought Yue'd be good with kids. He didn't either but Kathryn loved him to death.  
  
Slowly Sakura made her way over to him and hugged him. "Let's go home," she said.  
  
Yue picked Kathryn up. "Yes, let's."  
  
~fin of Epilogue~  
  
A/N: like I said at the beginning, there will be a sequel! Eventually... Anywho, review or e-mail me on what you thought the story was like in all. I will accept negative criticism but!!! no flames. 


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